We are in a series all about maturity, what it actually is and how we can foster it in the youth we love and serve.  (Be sure to visit Part 1of this series and recap how maturity is first an outcome of discipline before it can ever be an input of character). 

We are starting with one of the most profound gifts we were ever given by our Father… love.  Because it is one of God’s greatest gifts, it is also one of the most attacked by the enemy. 

What Is and Isn’t Love

When you look up the ...

In our house we have learned (many times the hard way) that privileges do not come with age, they come with maturity.

Since when did passing time become a standard by which we are ready for things in life?  I don’t care how much time passes there are many things I will never be equipped for simply because more days are in my rearview.  

Maturity, on the other hand, is a much better predictor of success, although never fool proof.  But it does require truly being a part of a child or youn...

Happy first day of FALL!!

First, I hope and pray you had a magical and breathtaking summer filled with those perfect, movie worthy days of play, adventure, laughter and meaning all drenched in sun kissed beads of water from pools, sprinklers, lakes or oceans with a great soundtrack going in the background.

That would be amazing…  but not exactly how I would describe my summer (despite my highest hopes and greatest intentions).

If I can’t sleep, I sometimes play this game called “Woul...

 A quick search of the word “balance” gives this definition: “a state of equilibrium where forces are equal and opposed, resulting in stability”. 

The interesting thing is that those opposing forces could be feathers butted up against one another or loaded dump trucks ramming one another with the same, but opposite, force.  Either way results in, what looks like, “balance”,  but they feel very different.

These past few weeks, after returning from a writing conference, battling a cold, my...

 Living on the coast, and especially at the end of a river that runs into the sea, I get to see the tides change firsthand every day.  The water is coming, standing still or going at any given time.

But it is never really “standing still”, is it? 

On the surface it looks calm and still, tranquil even, while, in reality, it is in transition between going here and going there.   I can imagine the water feeling the pressing forces from both sides closing in during that time, relentlessly sq...

 Ummmmm…. Nellie, what did you just ask me?

No, I don’t mean THAT, but I do want to see what “f word” you and the young women you lead are.

First, a quick history lesson.

Most of us have heard of “fight or flight”, right?  This is what I grew up learning in my most basic psych classes and even into higher level classes.  This term was coined by an American physiologist named Walter Cannon in the 1920’s.  This was the standard for over 50 years, but as studies were underway it was dis...

 Call me crazy, but I love watching a good nature documentary.  They are interesting, dramatic, full of action and there are always moments of awe and bewilderment.  But, let me just say that there are few things more wild and bewildering than a cruise ship Lido deck on spring break!  Last week I took one of my 17-year-old daughters on our mother/daughter trip, and it was an amazing time full of big laughs [anyone that knows Trinity, knows the humor that comes with her] and even bigger adventure...

Maybe it's just me, but probably not.

This one is vulnerable friends and written to the women out there, but also for the men.  I am ushering it out the publishing door and into the great big world with my heart on my sleeves.  But maybe, just maybe, you will relate, understand and even be able to communicate even just a little better next time because of what I am about to share.  If that’s true, I write this for you.

As a wife, a mom of four adolescent girls, a youth leader, a family c...

How to Talk to Someone Who Will Not See Truth Right Now

In the world there are as many variations of truth as there are perspectives it seems.  I was told once that there are always 3 truths at play when it comes to perspective and human relations.

1. Theirs
2. Yours
3. The non-emotional 3^rd party truth

This is one of the many reasons why I am so glad that I have a firm foundation in the ultimate truth in my life (John 14:6).  I floundered for 35 years on this planet trying to define and d...

Remember the Monster’s Inc. character, Roz, when she slowly grumbles, “Always watching” at the end of the movie with her pointed eyeglasses sitting intimidatingly on the bridge of her nose?  Yeah, well, this is the same with kids.  They are always watching. 

How many sitcoms have played off kids repeating the words adults say around them and get in trouble for it or, even closer to home, how many times have you gotten frustrated at your kids for having a reaction to something only to realize...