The Leadership of Prayer Hidden Prayer

Someone once asked me how many times I pray for my children in a week.

At first, the practical side of my brain tried to count.

But I quickly realized…

That’s not something you can measure.

Because for me, it’s not a number.

It’s a posture.

I am always praying for my girls.

In my own struggles I hope they avoid.
In the triumphs I cheer them through.
In the challenges I sit beside them in—heart racing, hands and legs fidgeting like a one-person band.
Even in the “intense fellowship” moments that come with the holding-on and letting-go years…

I am praying.

In the quiet moments when I simply see them.
When I hear them.
When they cross my mind for no reason at all…

I am praying.

But it wasn’t always this way.

I didn’t grow up in the church or with a deep relationship with Christ.

Faith was something distant—close enough to claim when asked, but not something I truly lived.

So when I came to know the Lord in my 30s, I had to learn how to pray.

Not recite.

Pray.

And that was different.

It required moving from my head to my heart.

But I knew it mattered—because Jesus modeled it, and Scripture speaks to its power (James 5:16).

Over time, prayer became less of an event…

And more of a conversation.

Now, I often can’t tell when I am and am not talking with Him.

Because that’s what prayer really is.

A conversation with God.

There are beautiful frameworks—the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9–13), ACTS (adoration, confession, thanksgiving and supplication), PRAY (praise, repent, ask, yield)…

And they are helpful.

But they are not the goal.

They are simply ways to open your heart to connection with Jesus.

So start wherever you are.

1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 says,

“Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances…”

Pray continually.

Not perfectly.

Not formally.

Continually.

When it comes to my girls—the ones entrusted to me, the ones we are shaping and sacrificing for—

I pray ceaselessly.

What does that look like?

It looks like:

• Praying as they step out from under your watchful protection
  • Praying over the car that now carries a piece of your heart down the road
  • Praying over their friendships and influences
  • Praying for the man your daughter may one day marry—and who he is becoming right now
  • Praying over her while she sleeps—peaceful, still, and unaware
  • Praying for her perspective, discernment, and exposure to the world
  • Praying for wisdom in how to lead her
  • Praying when you have no words… just “help,” “thank you,” “please,” “Jesus”
• It looks like praying for trust, submission, unrelenting forgiveness and understanding.
• It looks like praying that God watch over them, guide them and love them in ways that you can’t even begin to.

This is the kind of prayer that shapes hearts.

This is the kind of prayer that changes the course of lives.

This is the leadership no one sees.

But she will feel it.

My daughters know.

They know I pray over them—in the quiet of night, on the tennis courts, in school hallways, in church rows, and even in the middle of hard conversations.

I pray.

Because the greatest battles in her life…

Will be won in places no one else can see.

And you get to be one of her greatest allies there.